Is Pastoral Restoration Biblical? The Ashley Madison Controversy Exposes Deeper Issues

Pastoral restoration? With all the moral failures in ministry lately what's a path to restoration? To my knowledge, The Bible doesn't lay out a path for "pastoral restoration" per se. I could be corrected, but all the things I have read on pastoral restoration use biblical passages on general Christian restoration. Let me propose that is because we have made the pastoral ministry something it was not meant to be. Have you ever heard the phrase "called to the pastoral ministry". That is kind of a misnomer because the role of pastor/overseer/elder are filled by particular spiritual gifts, not this huge hierarchical position that we have turned it into. That is why the the scripture only lays out qualifications for those who practice their pastoral gifts. If a man falls into a "sexual sin" he is just no longer qualified because he is not "above reproach" anymore. 

Let me ask you a question to clarify. If a person with the gift of evangelism is caught in an adulterous relationship, does that disqualify them from the spiritual gift of evangelism? No, of course not they have just fallen into sin and need to be restored, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
(Galatians 6:1-2 ESV)

Or put another way. What if another with the spiritual gift of helps and hospitality has been found to have abused their hospitality, and had an inappropriate sexual relationship with a guest? Are they disqualified from the spiritual gift of hospitality? No they still have the spiritual gift they just need to be restored in a "spirit of gentleness."

I believe that the problem is that we have elevated the "ministry" to a place where I believe the New Testament did not mean it to be elevated to. The New Testament writers talk about the pastoral giftings as "one among many" gifts that are equal to any other gift in the body. So, in our current structure, when a pastor falls into sin it is more egregious than when a person with the gift of hospitality falls into an inappropriate sexual relationship. 

Also the modern pastor has more visibility than in the past. With the rise of the of the Internet with sermons online, and other organizations like the Gospel Coalition, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Acts 29, and pastoral conferences with thousands in attendance, and other such church planting and ministry training organizations, there has been this unbiblical and unhealthy move toward superstar attractional ministry leadership models. You can probably name your favorite pastor. Where do you know them from? Probably online. I am as guilty in supporting this as any other. How often have I watched a sermon from a talking head superstar pastor? How often have I read their books? How often have I visited their church or personal websites? This feeds the system. However, the New Testament had a completely different style of pastoral leadership. It was a bottom up, one of many, servant leadership type of shepherding ministry that was happy to be unknown outside of the congregation of which they were shepherds. 

They (i.e. The Apostles) didn't train for years and years in seminaries separated from the local body they had come from. Only to return later to another Church that they had no previous contact to. Being devoid of any real practical experience besides a one year practicum/internship, in which they got to preach one time on a Sunday where almost the whole church was away on vacation. See my point? We have to radically rethink the pastoral ministry. 

Besides all this. If the spiritual gifts are spread out in the congregation relatively equally, how many with the pastoral gifting would there be in a typical church. Probably in a church of 200 there might be up to 10% that's about 20 people or so with that gift. What are those men doing with their pastoral/teaching gifting? Probably sitting on their hands because the lead pastor has his "Kung-Fu grip" on the reigns of leadership. They probably aren't even aware they have a pastoral gifting. I bring this up because if there were 20 pastors of a church it would protect the church when one of the pastors fell. The church could carry on and the church would be able to "restore such a one (fallen pastor) with gentleness" without everything collapsing. But as is the current leadership structure, there is one pastor who has full and final authority. Elder and Deacon boards do nothing in practicality in those leadership structures. Actually they do something, everything the pastor tells them to do. This must change!

Let me be clear, I do not believe that a pastor caught in a extra-marital affair should just be kept in ministry after forgiving him, or one week later hired somewhere else. Or worse yet taking on a new Church Plant in a different city. What I am saying is that the whole system is unbalanced, and lends to a unbalanced pastoral ministry. We need a practical pastoral reformation, kind of like the great theologies that were won for us in the first reformation (i.e. "the priesthood of all believers."). That Priesthood of all believers needs not just to be believed, but practiced in our current congregations. In other words "every member a minister." 

The current Ashley Madison controversy exposes many problems and we are all going to talk about the sexual aspects and what is wrong with pastors. We definitely need to bring those secrets out so that the Church can deal with it, and seek to be a righteous and pure bride once again. But I want to challenge us to think in Biblical paradigms, and not to leave the current hierarchical pastoral position untouched. 

Pastor, please do not continue to usurp authority, but rather give it away. What I mean is in areas that the Bible does not prescribe for you to have authority over, please give your authority to other gifted men who are there already in your congregations. Train others to take your job and take your place. Its kind of like working yourself out of a job. In the end you and your church will be stronger and more protected as a result. Ultimately God is in control of His Church, and He will see that it is transformed from the top to bottom. Let us with renewed vigour make Jesus Lord, and ask our congregations to practice the priesthood of all believers along with us who are spiritually gifted as pastors, so that the body can be whole from the bottom on up. The most encouraging thing about Pastoral failure, or the Church being in upheaval is that Jesus still reigns! No matter how bleak things look he shall reign forevermore, and He can redeem, He can salvage, and mend all that was broken. My new favorite song is by The Silver Pages an old Hymn called "Jesus Shall Reign." I hope it encourages your heart that Jesus is the cornerstone of His church!

Cultivating Curiosity in the Name of Christ

Pastoral ministry requires a person to be curious and genuinely curious about other people. Over the years, I’ve found that ministry required me to be curious about people, and early on in my ministry, I noticed I was genuinely uncurious, arrogant and proud.

A mentor pointed this out to me. It was hard to hear, but it was the best thing he could’ve done for me at the time. I went with him on a weekend retreat where he was the speaker. On our way there, he said to me, "You interrupt people all the time."

I was shocked. He said I had interrupted his wife at dinner at least a dozen times. They were looking at each other, thinking, “Who is this guy; what is he doing?” He offered to observe me over the weekend and let me know what he noticed by the end of our time ministering together. 

At the end of the weekend, he told me he felt I cared more about myself, and what I wanted to say, than about other people and what was on their minds.

This hurt to hear, but it was so eye opening. I realized I needed to overhaul my pride, and my lack of curiosity. I needed to flex my selflessness muscles and genuinely begin caring about people’s souls, interests, passions and needs. James, the brother of Jesus, has this wise advice for us: When we’re tempted to speak first in any situation, we need to choose first to listen, understand and ask questions.

Are you curious, or are you self-important, arrogant, and proud? Here are a few ways to discern where you need to grow:

1.       Do you come into groups of people and begin immediately to talk about yourself or what's happening to you?

2.       Do you, like me, interrupt people when they’re in the middle of a sentence or thought? Do you rush to interject your opinion, tell a story about yourself, or somehow promote yourself?

3.       Do you ask questions of people? Do you seek to get to know people beyond surface level?

4.       Have people ever made these types of comments to you: “you talk too much,” “you interrupted me,” or “you’re not listening”?

5.       Do people seem to pull away from you after a while, even people you had considered a friend?

In order to become deeply caring and curious people, we need to be transformed by Jesus. For me it is happening as I submit myself to the direction of the Holy Spirit. My wife has also sharpened me; she knows my struggles and challenges me. "You aren't listening," "you’re interrupting," she will graciously point out.  

We can also grow by asking other people who are close to us: "Do you feel listened to by me?" "Do I have any blind spots in my character?" Our culture is head over heels for celebrities, starved for information about the rich and the famous, but our Christ call us to minister to the poor, marginalized, hurting, unpopular, and unfamous. Christ is calling his church to be genuinely curious about those that cannot repay you or return the favor:

“(Jesus) said also to the man who had invited him, ‘When you give a dinner or a banquet, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, lest they also invite you in return and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you. For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the just’” (Luke 14:12-14).

Let us with fresh vision obey the words of Jesus, and with great curiosity, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, “and you will be blessed.”

Questions Pastors Should Get Asked in Interviews But Don't

I am currently looking for a position in Youth Ministry/Pastorate/Church Planting and I have been interviewed for several positions. I am sad to say that the meat of the interview is usually filled with questions that don't really help them understand you as a pastor. For instance one question I have been asked lately was, "What can you do for our Church?" or I even met for an informal interview recently and was told all about the Church, but never asked a question. As I thought back on my professional life in ministry which has included hundreds of interviews, and service in several church contexts, I have only on one occasion been asked a good question. A search committee of lay people, two women I deeply respect, asked the question, "If you had one chance to say something to a student, what would it be?" I was floored at the great question, and began to share the gospel as I would share it with a student because that is the one thing worth sharing! So, I have been surprised recently by the questions that pastors never get asked in interviews. The following is a list of questions that pastors should get asked in interviews, but don't. A quick disclaimer. I have never been asked these questions in a live person to person ministerial interview (occasionally on a application) but I know some men have been asked these question. So my disclaimer is that most men like me do not get asked these questions and probably should. 

1. Describe your theology.
I know many men get asked about their theology; sadly, I have never been asked this question during an interview. If I have interviewed on hundreds of occasions and never been asked this question, you can bet that many other men are also not being asked this question. Your theology is very important! Your theology describes how great or how small a view of God you have as a pastor. And frankly I want a pastor who has a high, and big, and grand view of God, not a small, measly, inept view. So let's start asking this question!

2. Tell us what you believe about the Bible.
I know that many people get asked this question too, but again I have never been asked this question. I have however been asked this question, but not in such an important process as an interview for a pastoral role, in which I would be responsible for shepherding those put in my care. If I have a weak view of the Bible, how am I to shepherd Christ's flock? Just a hint: the only thing that you can shepherd Christ's flock with is His book, the Bible. We should definitely be asking this question in interviews!

3. Tell us about your devotional life.
Again it would seem like this would be toward the top of the list as a question that we ask pastors in interviews but sadly it is not. A pastor's ability to feed the souls of his congregation is directly proportional to how he regularly feeds his own soul. Does he regularly receive nourishment in his own soul from his disciplined, celebratory, meditative, joyous, worshipful communion with Christ? If not, then you do not want him as your pastor.

4. Tell me about your relationship with your wife and kids.
Unfortunately the state of ministry is abysmal in this area. I know personally so many stories of how ministry becomes a pastor's mistress. I have recently heard of a man who was the leader of a large evangelical ministry and had some kind of "inappropriate affair" with a woman who was not his wife. The board asked him to step down, and the ministry has since closed up shop! Do you want your pastor to fall into this same, sadly, not uncommon situation? Then ask him about this! 

5. When was the last time you looked at pornography? or Do you have an internet addiction of any kind?
Unfortunately, men in the ministry are looking at porn at the same rate as the world. The computer guy at my last church recounted to me several pastors that he had to clean up their computer and the problems were the multitude of porn they had on their computers. You may want to ask them about this in a loving and open way realizing that it might be a problem currently for the guy you are interviewing. I had a serious problem with pornography, and 12 years ago God freed me and by His grace I have been free from it ever since. I take extreme measures in my life today to stay free from it! and My wife graciously is my strongest and best accountability! If you do not ask your pastor you are interviewing about this issue, then your Church might be blindsided by this problem later. At the very least you may find yourself wondering why your Church is not experiencing blessing, and it might be that your pastor has an internet addiction, or porn problem.

6. Tell us about your view of sanctification?
This might relate to the previous question also. If you are a church that values victorious Christian living, you might want to know if your pastor believes, teaches, lives, and exemplifies the victorious Christian life. I know I do, and I have have never really been asked about this in any interview I have had. 

7. If you had a chance to tell a student/person one thing, what would it be and why?
I have been asked this question! It was the best question I have ever been asked in an interview! That probably has a lot to do with why I stayed almost 9 years at that church. They believed in taking opportunities and making the most of them for the gospel. They loved their community, and preached the gospel every moment they could. At this church my office was straight across from the associate pastor for years. I think I must have overheard him lead hundreds of people to Christ over the years. If you ask this question as a church or search committee, it shows you want to make the most of every opportunity you have as a church to impact your community for Christ.

I wanted to also put out there a few questions that might not be as important as the previous questions, but they could definitely help you understand the person you might call to be your shepherd. This could also help you avoid a lot of conflict.

8. What is the most difficult thing you have ever gone through, and how did you deal with it?
The answer to this has shaped my ministry over the years. Has a pastor really ever gone through something of heart-wrenching difficulty? Has he had to deal with the most difficult things in life and how did he lean on the Lord through it? If he has he will be a better pastor. Maybe you would rather have a pastor who has dealt with the very difficult side of life, and has trusted in a great and good God to pull him through. Your church will be better for it. 

9. What is your best experience in church life? And worst?
This might also give you a good picture into how a pastor would lead you in the difficult aspects of church life. Has he experienced some extraordinary level of unity in the body? Or has he ever had to excommunicate someone? Has he ever had to display the love of Christ in church discipline? has he ever been fired or pushed out of a church? Has he ever had to fire a staff member, etc.?

10. How will you shepherd/protect the flock? How will you guard the purity of the church?
His answer to this is very important. He may be able to describe how he would do this, but this question might catch a pastor a little off guard. You may want someone who can describe instances of where and how he has sought to protect the flock, or at least be able to describe how he would. 

11. Describe your vision for the church (universal and local).
This question may be a little higher or lower in importance depending on how your church likes vision, mission, and strategy related topics. If he can articulate, a specified vision for a church, that might help you see how he fits into your particular church's life. 

12. Do you have a personal mission/vision/strategy for ministry?
This relates to the previous question and may also be more important to your church than at the bottom of the list, but it can be helpful so see if a person lines up with the particular direction of your church.  

13. Do you have a life verse/purpose?
I always found this interesting and it always helped me get to know a person more if I knew their life verse. How well do you know the man that you are calling to be your pastor? If he has a life verse that also might be helpful to get to know him better. I have known my life verse to give me direction, purpose, and a deep calling in this life's journey.

These might not all be appropriate to be asked in your particular context, but I have been interviewing lately and I wanted to give churches and ministries something to think about as they seek to hire church staff and especially pastoral staff. One thing you might do, would be to put many of these questions on a deeper application/Biblical beliefs application for those you have narrowed your search down to. I have come up with this also to help churches and people see how lacking our typical search process is for finding pastors. I have found that men are in the pulpit without churches really knowing who a person is, or if he is really walking in victory. I want to assure you many men are not walking in spiritual victory who are pastors (read Dangerous Calling for more in depth look at the state of ministry).
And when you do hire a pastor get to know him, invite him to your home, meet with him, pray with him, and seek him out as a person, and let him pour the word of God into your life. You will be glad you did.

Dangerous Calling from Crossway on Vimeo.